Soundcheck
by whiskeyprincessx
Summary: Bella: a doctor by day, gig-goer and music lover by night. Edward: lead singer of the hottest new band by night, brooding and lonely by day. She thinks he's a player; he thinks she's out of his league. They meet at one of his concerts. Can she save him? Can he make her feel again?
1. Chapter 1: BARFLY

**CHAPTER 1: BARFLY**

I loved you then  
I love you now  
So make me laugh  
For an hour  
Then rip me off  
High as a cloud  
And leave that taste  
In my mouth

\- Catfish and the Bottlemen: Oxygen

 **-X- BPOV -X-**

I inhaled deeply, squeezed my lips shut, and waited. _Maybe if I pretend to be asleep she'll go away._

"Oh stop it Bella," Alice stomped her foot. "We've waited ages for this gig, and I had Jazzy pull some serious strings to get us this show. So come on."

I let out the air I'd been holding in. Don't get me wrong – I live for these intimate shows, and seeing my favourite artists performing only a few metres away from me was indescribable. But this one was different and I couldn't help but think the night was going to turn out horrible.

I opened my eyes to see Alice looking at me expectantly. "Fine, I'll put on the outfit and I'll come with you. But don't expect me to enjoy myself," I pouted at her now smiling face.

"Ah Bella! I have a feeling this show is going to be something different entirely. Like an off-the-scale special!" she squealed and pulled me up from the bed.

 _I hope you're right Alice, I really do._

 _. . . . . .SC._

45 minutes later we arrived at 'Barfly'. Alice's fiancé and one of my best friends, Jasper, owned the music venue, and managed to get one of his high-school mate's band to perform here tonight. _Ellipsis_ was one of the hottest bands in the charts right now: a reason why I wasn't ecstatic to see them like Alice was. Obviously I enjoyed their music and listened to their live videos on YouTube, but I wasn't sure why they were playing such a small venue when they could easily sell out the O2.

Another major reason was the lead. The amount of groupies that followed them because of him was ridiculous, and I never understood the obsession with him.

I mean _yes_ he was gorgeous, and _yes_ his voice was like honey and roughness with a sprinkle of a heavenly-blessing from the gods themselves … but _he_ was just a person who created the music, and the music is all everyone should care about. _Ugh the way media handled artists really did get on my wick._

The lights dimmed and I was brought out of my mind-rambling.

"BELLS THIS IS IT OMG OMG OMG LOOK IT'S HAPPENING NOW!" Alice shouted in my ear as the drummer of the band came on stage.

I laughed with her and squeezed her hand in mine. "Breathe darlin, breathe."

Despite my previous hesitation, the giddy atmosphere of the crowd was contagious. Ali had somehow managed to weave our way to the front and now we were right at the bar.

Suddenly I was pushed up against said bar, and the people began to go nuts. I felt Ali dig her fingers into my hand as the lead came out onto the stage with an acoustic guitar slung lazily over his torso.

I held my breath.

He came to the front of the centre stage, where I could see his beat-up Doc Martens. I smirked and shuffled my own Doc-clad feet.

He was different than I imagined. He wore black skinny jeans which clung to his long legs, and a plain white t-shirt. The many material festival bracelets reflected my own, and disarray of hair atop his head was enhanced by the stage lights.

There was a buzz of excitement. I realised he was speaking into the mic and focused on his words.

" …say a huge cheers to everyone for coming out tonight. We don't get to play such intimate venues anymore at the risk of disappointing our fans," he smirked and shifted his guitar. "So when my long-time friend asked me to play here tonight, I immediately took the opportunity – take out set back to the basics, you know?"

I watched him as he spoke more about the songs the band was going to play. The way his lips and jaw moved, and the way he ran his hand through his hair – as if nervous – made me realise why so many teenage girls followed him.

He was intoxicating to listen and look at.

 _But you're not that girl, Bella._

I shook my head and realised why I knew this wasn't a good idea.

 _He's famous and gorgeous and could get any girl he wants; you're a plain girl who just finished medical school and has a screwed-up past – the only reason he'd want you is to play out his 'Naughty Nurse' fantasy._

Before I knew it, they had played most of their set, with only two songs left to go. I must admit that their music was so refreshing and honest, you couldn't _not_ enjoy yourself. But every time he sang, my eyes drifted back to him. The way his muscles flexed under his tight t-shirt every time he strummed the guitar. The veins that came out in his neck when he strained to sing a more challenging note.

And sometimes, I could have _sworn_ we made eye-contact.

 _But stuff like that only happens in books and movies – this is the real world._

A part of me hoped nevertheless that there might be something there – I mean who wouldn't? Girl goes to gig, singer sees her in crowd and they fall madly in love, and the rest is history.

But that thought came to a screeching halt when I saw him wave and blow a kiss to someone at the back of the venue.

 _Of course he has a girlfriend. You'd be stupid to think otherwise._

My chest constricted, and I felt a pain that had been alien to me since I was young: jealousy.

I had to get out of here or I'd embarrass myself. Motioning to Alice that I was too hot and going to get a drink, I found my way out through the commotion of people.

I made my way over to the bar. Good thing Embry was working tonight, I needed something strong but wouldn't kill me tomorrow morning.

"Hey Bells!" Embry grinned. "You enjoying it tonight?"

"Eh," I shrugged nonchalantly. I didn't feel like spilling all my problems to him tonight. "Can I have an Embry-special please? I have an afternoon shift tomorrow."

"Gotcha Bells," he winked and started prepare my drink.

After thanking Embry and promising to chat soon, I grabbed my drink and weaved between the people towards the back entrance of the bar. Alice knew that's where I always went if things got too much inside the venue, and no one else ever came out here apart from the bands' techies bringing in their equipment.

I sighed as the cool London air hit my face and neck, and all felt alright again. I sat down on the step just outside the venue door, with the drink cooling my hands. The wind chilled me skin, but not enough to make me shiver.

I don't know how long I sat there, but I heard _Ellipsis_ finish their set and the DJ start playing music to carry on the party until morning as per.

I always gave Alice about 20 minutes to find Jasper and say her 'goodbye', and she'd come back here to find me so we could head home. She decided that she wouldn't move out from our apartment yet, until I could find a roommate and she approved of her or him. I tried to tell her she was being silly and needed to move in with her fiancé but she was insistent and threatened to buy me a cat as a roommate if I didn't drop it. I hate cats.

The door behind creaked under its weight as it was pushed opened.

 _Time to go home._

"Sorry I had to leave Ali, but I couldn't take another minute at the barrier," I started to get up a brush of my jeans from the dirt of the step. "Told you I didn't want to see them – It just got too much so I hope you don't mind I had to slip out."

"Well I'm gutted you had to leave," I froze. Shit. That definitely wasn't Alice. "But I am curious as to the reason you had to make a quick escape in the middle of the set?"

 _Holy shit._

 _This is not happening._

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .SC.

Hey everyone!

So I'm back with a different story:-) This one is based more on personal experience and feelings, and so far it's so much more fun to write ... so i hope you guys enjoy it!

Let me know if I should continue with it or if you find it too boring :D

Much love to everyone as always,

Mimi xoxo


	2. Chapter 2: ANXIETY

CHAPTER 2: ANXIETY

I hope that no one ever leaves,  
'Cause I don't wanna be alone with me  
Not with the things that rush up and down this symphonous smile  
Here comes the love anxiety  
Can't let it grab a hold of me, not after last time

\- The Wombats: Here Comes the Anxiety

 **-X- BPOV -X-**

There are approximately 3 million people in the UK, living with an anxiety disorder. Anxiety is a normal response to stress or danger, and is often called the 'flight or fight' response. This process involves Adrenalin being quickly pumped through the body enabling it to cope with whatever catastrophe may come its way.

The last time I had an anxiety attack was on the day I received my A-Level grades*, when I finally realised that moment affected my whole future.

That was over five years ago.

I'm currently standing in the alley behind 'Barfly'- mine and Alice's favourite gig spot - trying to calm myself before I go under.

"Are you okay?"

Soft touch on my shoulder. My diaphragm constricted further.

 _So glad I didn't have those donuts Alice brought home yesterday._

I didn't trust my voice enough, so I nodded in response.

The warm hand left my shoulder, and I heard him move to stand in front of me.

I felt my chest and face heat up, but I wasn't sure if it was from the panic or the proximity he was standing at.

He sighed. "Look I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable," he murmured, running his thumb across his lip. "I hope this doesn't come between us-"

"Us?" I manage to croak out, my voice still tight with panic.

Even he looked surprised at what he said. "Well I didn't mean _us_ as in like a couple or-"

I finally found my voice. The 'flight' part of the 'flight or fight' instinct kicked in and I knew I had to get out of here.

"Look Masen," I started. "I came out tonight to have fun with my best friend, just like we do every night we come here. I didn't come here to find a guy or a relationship. I _definitely_ didn't come here to have a quickie with the lead of the band performing. I am not impressed by your reputation, Masen, and I feel sorry for all the girls who started a conversation with you."

He looked stunned, running his hand through his hair, but I kept going. "I didn't know this is where you picked up girls, but I came out here for some peace. So I would really appreciate it if you left me alone and didn't approach me again. Cheers."

Ducking my head away from his gaze, I darted for the door and didn't look back.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-

"Are you sure you're okay?"

 _Argh._ She knew something was off the moment I came back from _outside_ and asked her if we could head home early.

"Al, I'm fine," I sighed, walking over to her and wrapping my arms around her neck. "If it was anything important I'd let you know, okay?"

She eyed me up before nodding a resigned 'okay', and returning the hug.

We headed to bed, deciding against watching a movie because Alice had to be up at 6 for work.

I had a hard time falling asleep that night, and welcomed the exhaustion that came about two and-a-half hours later.

Perhaps I had been a bit harsh on him – I mean I didn't know him so I didn't really have the right to have a go, but nevertheless he was way too forward.

Then I decided it really didn't matter.

He tried to make a move, I denied him and now we'll never have to see each other again.

 _Right?_

. . .

 **Sorry about the short update guys, been hella busy looking at Unis and other almost-adult stuff - ew, I know.**

 **Hope I didn't disappoint with this one adn you guys like it :)**

 **I'm halfway throguh writing the next chapter so shouold have it up in the next couple of days.**

 **Much love to everyone xoxo**

 *** for all my non-UK readers: A-Levels are a two-year course you do in school when you're 16-18 years old. The path people usually choose after that is University :)**


	3. Chapter 3: SEE

**CHAPTER 3: SEE**

You could have just propped me up on the table like a mannequin  
Or a cardboard stand-up and paint me (paint me  
Any face that you wanted me  
To be seen.

\- Ben Folds: You Don't Know Me

 **-X- EPOV -X-**

I can't remember the last time we finished the set with an acoustic song, but as my fingers strummed the last chord of the song, I knew it would be something to consider doing in the future.

If it's even possible, the crowd went wilder for that one acoustic song than it did for any other up-beat tune we encored with.

But the roar of the crowd was muted, because I had somewhere to be.

I caught Jasper's eye as I bounced down the stage steps, eager to get outside. He gave me the same knowing look as when he caught me staring at _her_ during our set. I jokingly tried to make him believe that I thought he was giving me some sexy looks, so I blew him a kiss. The fans went crazy, probably thinking it was for a girl. Typical.

This time there were no kisses blow, just a nod of acknowledgment that he had figured me out.

I never did this. Contrary to what the media and paps always said about me, I haven't been with anyone since I left high school. After the band hit off, I was either touring or recording or writing new music or doing interviews to get us out there. There was no time for relationships, even when the loneliness really started to get to me – especially on tour.

In all honesty, it's not like the women in my life were even interested in me by that point. They loved the guy who was portrayed by the media – cheeky but kind, a flirt but a gentleman, mysterious but apparently they all knew me.

When I tried dating, all we'd talk about was the band: what is the new album like? Is it fun being on tour? Can I get free tickets for the tour? By the fourth date, I gave up and realised it was all going to be the same. They only saw Edward Masen, the lead singer of _Ellipsis,_ and multi-millionaire. They saw who they wanted to see and who the media created. They didn't see _me._

But this … this feeling? I couldn't shake it. I was a nerd back in high school, and this is the type of feeling that we read about in our Literature classes. That one-in-a-lifetime feeling. I couldn't just let it go.

I somehow managed to dodge all the swarms of girls, eventually making it to the door that led outside.

That led to _her._

 _Pull yourself together Masen. You don't want her thinking you're some kind of creep, following her out to the backstreet …_

 _Good point._

I took a deep breath and pushed open the door

 _Fuck me, could the creaking be any louder? I'll have to tell Jazz to get some WD40 on this wreck._

Before I even fully made it through the door, she started talking.

"Sorry I had to leave Ali, but I couldn't take another minute at the barrier." _Please turn around. Please look this way._ "Told you I didn't want to see them – It just got too much so I hope you don't mind I had to slip out."

 _I guess it was my turn to say something?_

"Well I'm gutted you had to leave," I cleared my throat, hoping I didn't scare her. "But I am curious as to the reason you had to leave?"

 _Please, please, please stay this time._

 _I think you could be the one to see me._

 **...**

 **Hello loyal, loyal friends.**

 **So, the good reviewers asked, and I have granted your wish.**

 **I hope this little insight into Edward's head keeps you sated until the next chapter. Do not worry - I'm already halfway through!**

 **As always, leave your thoughts, feelings and suggestions in the reviews.**

 **Eagerly waiting to hear from you all.**

 **Love,**

 **M xoxo**


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